RSS Feed
Twitter
5:00 AM
nintendo
This whole issue of folks coming to the US and not learning a lick of English is getting out of hand.
So check this out. I am hungry as hell. It's late. But, I am hungry. Also, I need money. I hate not having shit in my pocket. I had some dollars hanging around somewhere but I didn't feel like looking.
I decide to drive to the bank. As I come out of the bank, this taxi cab pulls up next to me. The driver, a Dominican fellow, needs some directions. I mute the radio to try to hear him clearly. I still can not understand a word he is saying. Ok, I understood the word "abbanoo" which is "spanglish" for avenue. But, I couldn't understand what avenue he wanted. It sounded like 18th avenue in the Bronx. There's no 18th avenue in the Bronx, at least none that I know and definitely not in the vicinity.
So, I look at the passenger. I figure he or she could tell me. This dude opens the window and it's a Mexican guy. Would you believe his English was WORSE than the cab driver's. If I didn't understand they were looking for an avenue in the first place, I would have been completely lost from what this guy is saying. So I tell them, "I don't understand you!" They drive off!
On my hunt for food I stop by the Arab bodega around corner from my home. It's late so they got the little window open with the KFC turning thing. Alex comes to the window to call the previous customer over to let him know his stuff is ready. The customer asks the clerk for something in some of the worse spanglish I had ever heard in my life. So the clerk speaks to him in Spanish but not any sentences, just the spanish words he's picked up over the years. So, he gets the items and change. The dude requests one more item. He doesn't know the word for it in English so he tells him in Spanish. Clerk doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak spanish. He just knows a few words. So the dude looks at me as if I was going to be able to help him.
"No hablo espanol!" My accent is so tight when I say that too! By the way, that means, "I don't speak Spanish." And yes, it's in Spanish.
Dude pops out a cell phone to make a call. Obviously, he's calling to find out the word for what he wants in English. I make my order while he's on the phone. I stand back. Clerk's bringing me my order. The dude is still on the phone. Finally, he blurts out the english word for the item he needed. No, I won't tell you yet. But, I knew it was going to cause trouble so I quickly jumped ahead and added a few more items so I could be done and not have to wait for upcoming conversation of frustration. I got my stuff and just watched as I walked away.
COOKIE! This is what he wanted. He wanted some damn cookies. The clerk asks him what kind of cookies? And, there goes the further frustration I anticipated! I walked back to my car, got in and drove away.
And, "resident Americans", before you decide to use this as fodder for your own anti-immigrant stupidity, explain yourselves: Anti-Immigration Protester Needs A Spell-Check. At least immigrants have a reason. Exactly, what is yours?
So check this out. I am hungry as hell. It's late. But, I am hungry. Also, I need money. I hate not having shit in my pocket. I had some dollars hanging around somewhere but I didn't feel like looking.
I decide to drive to the bank. As I come out of the bank, this taxi cab pulls up next to me. The driver, a Dominican fellow, needs some directions. I mute the radio to try to hear him clearly. I still can not understand a word he is saying. Ok, I understood the word "abbanoo" which is "spanglish" for avenue. But, I couldn't understand what avenue he wanted. It sounded like 18th avenue in the Bronx. There's no 18th avenue in the Bronx, at least none that I know and definitely not in the vicinity.
So, I look at the passenger. I figure he or she could tell me. This dude opens the window and it's a Mexican guy. Would you believe his English was WORSE than the cab driver's. If I didn't understand they were looking for an avenue in the first place, I would have been completely lost from what this guy is saying. So I tell them, "I don't understand you!" They drive off!
On my hunt for food I stop by the Arab bodega around corner from my home. It's late so they got the little window open with the KFC turning thing. Alex comes to the window to call the previous customer over to let him know his stuff is ready. The customer asks the clerk for something in some of the worse spanglish I had ever heard in my life. So the clerk speaks to him in Spanish but not any sentences, just the spanish words he's picked up over the years. So, he gets the items and change. The dude requests one more item. He doesn't know the word for it in English so he tells him in Spanish. Clerk doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak spanish. He just knows a few words. So the dude looks at me as if I was going to be able to help him.
"No hablo espanol!" My accent is so tight when I say that too! By the way, that means, "I don't speak Spanish." And yes, it's in Spanish.
Dude pops out a cell phone to make a call. Obviously, he's calling to find out the word for what he wants in English. I make my order while he's on the phone. I stand back. Clerk's bringing me my order. The dude is still on the phone. Finally, he blurts out the english word for the item he needed. No, I won't tell you yet. But, I knew it was going to cause trouble so I quickly jumped ahead and added a few more items so I could be done and not have to wait for upcoming conversation of frustration. I got my stuff and just watched as I walked away.
COOKIE! This is what he wanted. He wanted some damn cookies. The clerk asks him what kind of cookies? And, there goes the further frustration I anticipated! I walked back to my car, got in and drove away.
And, "resident Americans", before you decide to use this as fodder for your own anti-immigrant stupidity, explain yourselves: Anti-Immigration Protester Needs A Spell-Check. At least immigrants have a reason. Exactly, what is yours?
