Half-Jewish?

I am not anti-semitic, I am anti-bullshitic!

Something has been hitting me in the head from time to time. It's never usually enough to warrant a blog but the buildup over the years brings me to mention and remind people of something.

JUDAISM IS NOT A RACE. IT'S A RELIGION.

Why do I feel the need to mention the obvious? Simple! How many times have we heard the FALSE term - half-jewish? Honestly, I am sick and tired of hearing that shit as if you can be half of a religion. People don't walk around saying they are half-Muslim and half-Buddhist! It would be the dumbest damn thing anyone would have ever said. So, how in the hell do Jewish and even non-Jewish people get away with claiming they're, or there is, something as silly as being half-Jewish? It's simple SAT question when you think about (see below):

Instructions: Choose the answer that fucking fits best!

Blue is to color as Jew is to

• a) race
• b) religion
• c) gender
• d) sexual preference
• e) fake ass Reggae artist

If a Jewish person donated sperm, would that child then be half-Jewish as if they were half-Black? No! That child wouldn't know a damn thing about Judaism. But, you sure as hell would know that the child was half-Black!

You'll know more so if the NYPD shoots 'em in the back for no reason (read: being Black)!

If they did DNA tests, would some "Jew" gene pop out with a propensity for craving money, having a big nose, and wearing a furry ass top hat during certain ceremonies? NO!

Anyway, lets quit this crap. People like Lenny Kravitz and Lisa Bonet are NOT half-Jewish. They are half-White. Are they really Jewish in faith and practice Judaism? Who the hell knows? Who the hell cares? The point is that there is no such thing as half-Jewish. You're either a Jew or you're not!

Now, anyone can claim their own bullshit theories, thoughts and ideas about this issue. But as I've said before, I am anti-bullshitic. So, I won't be paying any attention to the bullshit as I have a bias against those who practice the religion of Bullshitism!

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U.S. Immigration THrough Investment

U.S. Immigration THrough Investment
by: Maury D. Beaulier

Approximately 10,000 immigrant visas per year are available to qualified individuals seeking permanent resident status on the basis of their engagement in a new commercial enterprise. Statistics on the EB-5 program show, however, that actual usage of this preference category has never come near the annual allotment of 10,000 visas for the program.

Eligibility Requirements

Foreign investors seeking permanent residence in the United States fall under the EB-5 immigrant visa category. Generally, investors must demonstrate that a "qualified investment" is being made in a new commercial enterprise. They must also show that 10 or more jobs are actually created either directly or indirectly by the new commercial enterprise.

In general, eligible individuals include those:

Who establish a new commercial enterprise by:

· creating an original business;

· purchasing an existing business and simultaneously or subsequently restructuring or reorganizing the business such that a new commercial enterprise results; or

· expanding an existing business by 140 percent of the pre-investment number of jobs or net worth, or retaining all existing jobs in a troubled business that has lost 20 percent of its net worth over the past 12 to 24 months; and

Who have invested -- or who are actively in the process of investing -- in a new commercial enterprise:

· at least $1,000,000 (or more in high employment areas), or

· at least $500,000 where the investment is being made in a "targeted employment area," which is an area that has experienced unemployment of at least 150 per cent of the national average rate or a rural area as designated by OMB; and

Whose engagement in a new commercial enterprise will benefit theUnited States economy and:

· create full-time employment for not fewer than 10qualified individuals; or

· maintain the number of existing employees at no less than the pre-investment level for a period of at least two years, where the capital investment is being made in a "troubled business," which is a business that has been in existence for at least two years and that has lost 20 percent of its net worth over the past 12 to 24 months.

* Keep in mind that the investor must also establish that the required amount of capital has been placed at risk for the purpose of generating a return on that capital. A mere intent to invest, or prospective investment arrangements entailing no present commitment will not suffice to establish that the petitioner is actively in the process of investing.

Procedure

INS Form I-526, Immigrant Petition by Alien Entrepreneur, is the form used to apply for investment-based immigrant status. The Form I-526 must be filed with supporting documentation which clearly demonstrates that the individual’s investment meets all requirements, such as:

· establishing a new commercial enterprise,

· investing the requisite capital amount,

· proving the investment comes from a lawful source of funds,

· creating the requisite number of jobs,

· demonstrating that the investor is actively participating in the business; and, where applicable,

· creating employment within a targeted employment area.

*Labor Certification by the Department of Labor is not required.

You can find the Form I-526 on our web site at by clicking on the Immigration Forms link.

Conditional Permanent Residence

Once the Form I-526 is approved, immigrant investors may obtain status as a conditional resident by:

· Filing INS Form I-485, Application to Register Permanent Residence or Adjust Status, if residing within the United States; or,

· Applying for an immigrant visa at a U.S. Consulate abroad, if residing outside the United States.

Removing Conditions on Residence

90 days before the second anniversary of your admission to the United States as a conditional resident, you must file INS Form I-829,Petition by Entrepreneur to Remove Conditions.

Keep in mind that U.S. immigration laws are based on federal statutes; therefore, we can assist you with your immigration needs no matter where you are located.

Our lawyers have assisted many entrepreneurs in purchasing businesses and investing in U.S. Business operations to qualify for an EB visa.

FOR MORE INFORMATION ON U.S. IMMIGRATION OR ASSISTANCE WITH YOUR IMMIGRATION NEEDS, PLEASE CONTACT: 952.746.2153 or visit Work Visa Lawyers.

About The Author

Maury D. Beaulier is part of a 29 attorney immigration law firm handling cases for clients across the United States and abroad. The firm and its members are recognized leaders in the U.S. Immigration and Naturalization process including asylum cases, work visas, investor visas and family based immigration. You may reach Mr. Beaulier at (952) 746-2153 or thorugh his immigration website located at Work Visa Lawyers.

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Please learn english!

This whole issue of folks coming to the US and not learning a lick of English is getting out of hand.

So check this out. I am hungry as hell. It's late. But, I am hungry. Also, I need money. I hate not having shit in my pocket. I had some dollars hanging around somewhere but I didn't feel like looking.

I decide to drive to the bank. As I come out of the bank, this taxi cab pulls up next to me. The driver, a Dominican fellow, needs some directions. I mute the radio to try to hear him clearly. I still can not understand a word he is saying. Ok, I understood the word "abbanoo" which is "spanglish" for avenue. But, I couldn't understand what avenue he wanted. It sounded like 18th avenue in the Bronx. There's no 18th avenue in the Bronx, at least none that I know and definitely not in the vicinity.

So, I look at the passenger. I figure he or she could tell me. This dude opens the window and it's a Mexican guy. Would you believe his English was WORSE than the cab driver's. If I didn't understand they were looking for an avenue in the first place, I would have been completely lost from what this guy is saying. So I tell them, "I don't understand you!" They drive off!

On my hunt for food I stop by the Arab bodega around corner from my home. It's late so they got the little window open with the KFC turning thing. Alex comes to the window to call the previous customer over to let him know his stuff is ready. The customer asks the clerk for something in some of the worse spanglish I had ever heard in my life. So the clerk speaks to him in Spanish but not any sentences, just the spanish words he's picked up over the years. So, he gets the items and change. The dude requests one more item. He doesn't know the word for it in English so he tells him in Spanish. Clerk doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak spanish. He just knows a few words. So the dude looks at me as if I was going to be able to help him.

"No hablo espanol!" My accent is so tight when I say that too! By the way, that means, "I don't speak Spanish." And yes, it's in Spanish.

Dude pops out a cell phone to make a call. Obviously, he's calling to find out the word for what he wants in English. I make my order while he's on the phone. I stand back. Clerk's bringing me my order. The dude is still on the phone. Finally, he blurts out the english word for the item he needed. No, I won't tell you yet. But, I knew it was going to cause trouble so I quickly jumped ahead and added a few more items so I could be done and not have to wait for upcoming conversation of frustration. I got my stuff and just watched as I walked away.

COOKIE! This is what he wanted. He wanted some damn cookies. The clerk asks him what kind of cookies? And, there goes the further frustration I anticipated! I walked back to my car, got in and drove away.

And, "resident Americans", before you decide to use this as fodder for your own anti-immigrant stupidity, explain yourselves: Anti-Immigration Protester Needs A Spell-Check. At least immigrants have a reason. Exactly, what is yours?

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Case Dismissed

First of all, let me begin with the court date I never mentioned. After the call about the ACD as described in the other post - My Case: Part Three: The ACD, I had to appear in court again. This was basically the point where my lawyer would fight for a complete dismissal since they offered the ACD. But, one thing we all must remember is that if it isn't on paper, it does NOT exist. Let's repeat that... IF IT IS NOT ON PAPER, IT DOES NOT EXIST. So, when we got into the court room, the individual handling my case didn't even show the fuck up. Supposedly, she was out sick or whatever and there were some other DAs there who said they didn't know anything about an ACD. I love this system. Doesn't phase me the least bit. I know these guys are about games and I love to play games anyway. Next court date is set for August 25th in the main courthouse - the big building with the statues out front!

So, today June 26th @ 12:13pm, my lawyer calls to tell me that he had a meeting with the big boys at the Bronx District Attorney's office. He tells me he had to play hardball with them a little bit. He told them that if they want the officer to perjure himself in court, that's fine. I wish I was there to hear that comment. He says that his client (that's me yo, that's me lol) means business. Anyway....

CASE DISMISSED

P.S. I love being an intelligent black man! Unfortunately, people constantly dismiss me because I am black. Fortunately, people consistently dismiss me for the same reason. It's all like a chess game. You underestimate your opponent and you lose. At the end of the day, I'll stay a winner! It'll take a lot more than some dumb ass white cops to get me. Next time, try a little harder children!

Update: I was never able to find Clinton. He knew of me and he knew I was a witness. If anything he could have gotten his lawyer to me.

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My Case: Part Three: The ACD

Yesterday, May 25th, 2006, my lawyer gives me a call to let me know that the DA has offered a deal called an ACD. ACD stands for "adjournment contemplating dismissal". Basically, this means that if I don't get arrested for 6 months, they would dismiss the case. My lawyer describes it as "if you were never arrested." Most people would take such a deal. It expunges all records and you can act as if nothing ever happened. However, I am not most people and I did refused the offer.

The problem with an ACD is that it treats me as if I did something wrong and they are trying to give me a way out or some sort of leniency. Well, I didn't do anything wrong. I didn't tell the cops to stop abusing a young man for no reason. They were brutalizing a young man - reason enough!

So my lawyer is basically telling me about the ACD and it's merits. He's not really trying to persuade me or sell me on the ACD. He just knows that my family and I want this to be over and done with. So, he's trying to sugarcoat it for me - make it easier to swallow. But, at the same time, I am no idiot. I know there's a lot more behind the ACD than what I am being told.

Besides the fact that an ACD is almost like a guilty plea, it also acts like a probation period. If I were to get arrested in that 6-month time period, they would be free to bring the case back up. With the stigma of accepting an ACD, I am almost guaranteed to be found guilty on all charges. I can see the judge asking me, "If you did nothing wrong, then why did you accept an ACD?" I won't be able to give a "good enough" answer to that question. Maybe I am a bit paranoid. But, this is still America and a man with my complexion doesn't get the luxury of being believed especially over white officers.

So, NO! I won't be accepting anything less than a complete dismissal.

But, there is even more behind the ACD. If I take this deal, I get to act as if nothing happened. I get to go back to the way things were. But, a lot happened. I had 24 hours of my life taken away. Those officers DID abuse that guy. They knocked three teeth out of his mouth, swelled up his eye, and that's just what's visible. So, how can I act as if nothing happened? How can I act as if things are back to the way they were? If I took the ACD, will that boy's teeth suddenly come back? Will the mace suddenly go back into the officers can? Will I get my 24 hours back? Will I get the money I spent on the lawyer back? Nope!

So, I got to thinking. The DA did get a chance to speak with this officer finally. The way these people made me out to look in their police report, the best they can come up with is an ACD!?! Shit! Allegedly, I was HANGING out of my window, I started a frigging riot, and I assaulted an officer of the law. They offer me an ACD? Yeah.. fuckin.. right! It sounds more like they are interested in sweeping me under the rug so no one could ever hear about what really happened that day. It's not like I need a whole lot of proof in the matter - just ask the guy they beat up to smile.

ACD is the perfect "get rid of a nigger" ticket they can use. My lawyer even told me they don't give ACD's out that often. If they got you, THEY GOT YOU! They aren't making deals. If they don't, they don't. They let it go! But, in cases like this where it can be far reaching, they make these kinds of offers. They know I am no dummy and they know the shit they said won't stand up against me. This is like chess to me right now! Their offense is too weak and their defense has too many holes. But, I never strike until I see a strategy form. Right now, I put them in a funny position. They can either tip the king - offer the dismissal. Or, they can try to move elsewhere - take it to trial and hope for the best.

We'll see!

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Update on my case. Part 2

Oh well. The so-called officer did NOT show up to the court room. The assistant district attorney has been trying to at least investigate the case which is a good thing but this officer is obviously NOT cooperating. Since it's not some big trial, they had an adjournment until next week on the 31st. At least my lawyer won't be charging me for the next appearance. LOL. So that's what happened.

Here are some more interesting parts. My lawyer spoke with the ADA and she seems to want to move to dismiss the case and call it a day. Honestly, in my opnion this is their best choice in the matter as if they tried to prosecute me, it would involve a lot more trouble for everyone in the matter. Also, I think the officer senses this and doesn't want to bother showing up. Or, maybe, as my lawyer mentioned, he's scared of coming in and having to go up against me. That one made me laugh. With the audacity and luxury of protection NYPD officers enjoy, why would he be afraid of me? I smell PUSSY!

On a side note: The ADA is fuckin cute! LOL. Hey, I am a man; let's leave it at that. She's got this serious face and she's so hardcore about her job. I hate that I have to go up against such a pretty woman. But, I do consider her an enemy of sorts. But, she's still cute. I even smiled at her when I saw her and I was trying to put on my game face. I know when I get my chance to talk and tell what happened, I'll be on point. But, as far as she's concerned.. let me keep it quiet.

Lastly, after everything is said and done, I am going to find that kid, Clinton, and try to get in contact with his lawyer. At least it would make things a bit easier on him if I could come in and be a witness for him. It's his case that's really important. It ain't about me at all. My case is small and most likely going to turn into a fine at it's worse. They are already talking dismissal so I think I have a little leeway to relax for now. His case is where the magic is going to happen. Dude may not be my friend or family but I ain't gon let him down! He might be a dumb ass and a criminal but everyone's got a story and he don't deserve to be railroaded like that.

I found this quote online and I thought it perfectly fit. Excuse me for trying to play a "leader"...

The death of democracy is not likely to be an assassination from ambush. It will be a slow extinction from apathy, indifference, and undernourishment. - Robert M. Hutchins

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Update on my case!

The case is tomorrow. In case you have no idea what I am talking about... What you in here for? I am very anxious about it! But, let me fill you in on something that happened about two weeks ago. On Wednesday, May 10th, my lawyer got me a meeting with the assistant district attorney who was assigned to my case. Supposedly, this is a big issue because normally you don't get a chance to speak with the ADA. Obviously, all she has to go on is the police report which is just rife with lies and impossibilities.

Anyway, I told my story. The ADA then tried to question me. She asked..
Did you see anyone else there?
I didn't see anyone because of the way I was positioned at the window. However, I did hear some screaming and what not to my left!
What were they screaming?
I couldn't hear exactly what it was but it was in reaction to the police beating up on the boy.
Did the police have a problem getting out of the area?
No. They pulled out with no problem when they were behind my building. And, they pulled out with no problem when they were in front of my building.
Where was I at the time of the other person's arrest? I
was watching the entire thing from my bedroom window on the second floor!

It's obvious at this point she's looking to support their allegation of inciting a riot. But, I don't plan on being that easy. I had to make sure she understood the timeline of events because I can tell if, or when, we get into court, she would try to make it seem like I caused those people to act up! And, according to the police report, I was hollering and screaming out the window when they pulled up.

So, my lawyer wants to concentrate on another issue of the report which just knocks me down! The officer claims that I "dropped" something on him. No one knows what this object was but it was the size of a "baseball". However, there's no charge for assault or attempted assault nor was there any evidence collected. I can see the ADA foaming at the mouth on this one. The pictures show that it would be impossible for me to "drop" anything as there's a 13 foot fenced-in yard under my window. She's all of a sudden changing the word "drop" to "throw" and "toss". All I can do is sort of smile and laugh at the whole issue while thinking, "This bitch is dirtier than the damn cop! She's trying so hard to get something! She's literally changing the FALSE facts of the case to suit her needs."

Anyway, we're done with the Q&A session. She decides to go to her supervisor and talk about it. She comes back 5 minutes later saying they will consider it and get back to us before the case. I should have just stayed home if that was going to be the case.

Well, tomorrow is my case and she hasn't gotten back to my lawyer as yet! I just spoke to my lawyer and he says that he would call her and try to find out what's going on.

I am just really anxious to hear what the judge will do or say when everything is finally presented and in the open. I wonder if the police involved will even have the courage to show up.

I will keep you guys posted!

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Life's Funny Little Things

So, I sit here bored out of my mind, desperately trying to fall asleep. My mind races over what's been, what is, and what might be. I decide to change my security camera position under the window sill. It's been bugging me for the last few days because I wanted a new position. I like to watch what's happening on the street below me. A new position would give me a new perspective - maybe.

As I stand up to do so, I notice, out of the corner of my eye, possibly out of the deepest corner of my peripheral vision, a small white.. something. As some of you know, my room isn't the cleanest in the world. Let's just say Hurricane Katrina made a quick stop here after it hit New Orleans. But, out of all this clutter, I noticed this little white something. It's a third, maybe a quarter, of a joint I rolled. That may not seem like much but you have to understand when I roll a joint, I roll em pretty thick and heavy. It's that concentration in such a small space that makes one of my joints pretty potent.

Anyway, it had to have some age on it because I hadn't smoked anything in 2 weeks and I was already wiring up. You see, I am kind of uptight about things - wired too tightly. Smoking calms me down, loosens me up. It keeps me from thinking about things too much as I am known to do.

I looked at it and got somewhat excited. I now had another thing to do besides reposition this camera. If I stop now to inspect this joint, I will never get to this camera I've already neglected quite enough. Well, you save the best things for last. I fix the camera and before I could close the window again my attention is focused on this joint on the floor. It's like a woman and I want to kiss her. I want that sensation again. How could I have forgotten all of this glorious herb? I think God did it. Or, maybe I did. The plant makes you somewhat forgetful but who cares; she's here now, she wants me and I want her.

I pick her up and inspect the body. I find her to be intact and begging for the heat of my Colibri. But, I want to tease her a bit, enjoy her scent, feel her body with my fingertips. I put her to my lips to breath her scent inside me. It's sort of like a taste test to make sure everything is just right! You don't just pick up a woman and start doing it. I had to make sure she's optimal because I don't want to put it in if neither one of us is ready. And, conditions are perfect.

I bit my bottom lip, trapping it between my teeth to moisten, and then lick the upper lip. I want this to be just right. She's only available to me this one time and I may not see her for another month or more. I grab my lighter and feel for the studs of the trigger. I pop the cap back to reveal the ignition chamber. I bring her to my lips, hit the trigger, and pull her essence into me. As I consume her, she consumes me. The air is flavored with her scent now.

Breath in, breath out. Repeat. Pass! To who? Back to myself.

I get a bit greedy with her. I pull on her too much. She sort of chokes me a little bit. This girl bites back. I need to ease up little bit in our session. I take my time and enjoy her to the fullest. Within a few minutes, she's giving me what I need - a release of my worries, a slight chuckle at my disposition, and an overall better time. A few minutes later and she's finished but my ride has just started.

I am high!

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What you in here for?

Ohhhhhhhhh my god, I swear I have told this story a million times already and I think I have. Anyway, here it goes. Yesterday, March 28th, 2006 at around 5pm I am sitting on my lazy ass watching some Quantum Leap on the Sci Fi channel, and chatting with my homegirl Kym. Outside of my window, I hear some scuffling and someone sounding like he in pain. I told Kym, "Oooooo fight! brb!" Now, I live on the second floor of my building so I can see them pretty well. I go to the window to see undercover cops handcuffing some guy on the ground. As I look around, there are more cops - 20 or more - some plain-clothes but most in uniform.

First of all, they picked him up by the cuffs which I know was murder. Then, as they walked him to the cruiser, they start wailing on him - about 5 cops holding him, kneeing him in the face, punching him, smacking him, and I noticed one cop hit him with a baton on the legs. I was just shocked that I am witnessing this from my bedroom window but I didn't say anything.. not yet. They're still walking him to the car and he's hung over barely standing on his own. The cop that held by the handcuffs swings his body so that his head hits the front-end of the cruiser. Then, they finally get him to the backseat and just before tossing him in, this cop - some dumpy fat ass who was already standing by the cruiser - peppersprays him in the face - for nothing. He was barely coherent after getting jumped by state-sanctioned thugs.

This guy is in the car now! There's a group at the end of the block that's getting louder. I can't really see who it is. The window is open but the screen is down and I had my small dresser in front of that window. It was difficult to lean over and see. All I can hear is them saying, "Stop hitting him like that!" A group of uniformed cops rush over to the crowd, followed by the plain-clothes cops as if they were looking for something or to arrest someone except the one cop who peppersprayed the kid in the first place. Next thing I see, the cop turns around and just splashes/soaks/drowns this guy in a steady 5-second stream of more pepperspray. Something inside me bubbled up and I yelled out of the window, "STOP THAT, STOP DOING THAT!" One other cop came back and yelled back at me, "SHUT THE FUCK UP!" So, I yelled back, "Fuck you, you cunt. Stop doing that shit!" They both taunted me saying, "Why don't come down here and say that?" I said, "I am right here sayin it!" They shut up, so I shut up! I was content with leaving it there. That one little fat ass stopped abusing the guy.

Next thing I know, this little fat cop is pointing his chubby little finger at me from the passenger seat of the cruiser. So, I point right back at him! He got out and called for the rest of his thugs to come get me. So, I see them proceed around the building to the front. So, I get dressed because I was in a t-shirt and my underwear! I didn't want them runnin through the house stressing my father so I met them downstairs with my camera taking pictures. They snatched up my camera and handcuffed me! I was never even read my rights - mostly because they had nothing to charge me with in the first place.

Fast Forward to when I finally was able to read the police report.

The police report was FULL OF LIES including some extras that didn't even have anything to do with the charges. First of all, I was charged with "Inciting a Riot" and "Disorderly Conduct". Let's discuss these charges. How in the hell does someone incite a riot from their 2nd floor bedroom?? Secondly, WHAT DISORDERLY CONDUCT?

The cop said that when they were pulling up, I was hanging out of the window screaming, "FUCK THE POLICE." That lie was repeated about 10 times throughout the police report because according to the cop, I said it that many times. If you KNOW me you know I don't go on like that - not repeating the same line over and over. That's jut not my style. If I am gon cuss someone out, I will use a multitude of cuss words and on top of that I was conscious not to cuss first! I only cussed at the cops AFTER they cussed at me! Secondly, it's impossible for me to be hanging out my window, screaming fuck the police when I didn't see shit until AFTER they arrived.

The next lie was the cop tried to hint in the report saying that I hit him wit something. The judge specifically stayed on this phrase during arraignment, "nearly missed". Judge wanted to know what to think - did I hit the cop or did I miss the cop? Judge says, "I interpret this as he did hit the officer as opposed to "nearly hitting" in which it would mean that he missed the officer." Retarded prosecutor said, "Well yes your honor, you interpreted it properly!" My lawyer got to digging repeating what I told him earlier, "If I was cop and you hit me or tried to hit me with something, I would charge with assault or attempted assault." My lawyer agreed and brought that up to the judge. On top of that, how could I hit him when the screen was closed! My shit is ALWAYS CLOSED!

Anyway, prosecutor tried to get $500 bail. I guess he thought I was a bum or something as if I couldn't pull $500 with ease. My lawyer SAUCED ME UP LOVELY! He told the judge, "Your honor, I would like my client to be released on his own recognisance. [Mr Taurus] is college educated. This is his first arrest ever. I know his father very well. His father is an English professor." The judge just sort of looked up at me and saw me lookin right into his eyes - HELD HEAD HIGH, NO FEAR. He asked what did I do? I proceeded to tell him and then the "pimp smack" hit me! Court Officer says, "You don't talk to the judge, you talk to the lawyer." Honestly, I felt pimp smacked right there. LOL. But, I told my lawyer, I am a self-employed marketing consultant and run my own business.

Rewind to just after they arrested me (I am going to try to keep it short)

These little idiot cops drive the long way to the precinct with my cuffs EXTRA TIGHT. I was laughing the entire way! It hurt but I was laughin at them because I knew the deal. They seriously thought they had some clown from the street. They didn't know what they had in the back of the squad car.

Anyway, we get to the 48th precinct and see this guy wilding out in the big cell, spitting all over the cell. They put me in the smaller cell with some other guy. So, we get to the, "What you in here for?" conversation! So, the guy in the cell with me is named Ralph and they picked him up on some cruelty to animals charge. I was just taken aback by that. I chuckled and asked, "You shooting dogs wit BB guns or something? Nah, the dog wasn't even in his care at the time. He thought the dog was ok and he was going pick him up. Instead, they came to his job and ASPCA picked HIM up instead. Funny shit, THEY HAD DUDE ON CAMERA. So, you might see Ralph on Animal Planet or something.

Then I tell them what I was in for! The guy in the other cell who was spitting blood speaks up! Come to find out, the kid they beat up was the very same little guy wilding out when I walked in. His name is Clinton and he was caught up in some attempted robbery or armed robbery shit. All I know is dude is gettin "sent up top" and will be doing hard time. It was kind of hard for me at this point because I know dude is hardcore and he's only 18. He should do that time for what he did cuz he did do wrong. I asked myself, should I really speak up? What if the cops treatment of this kid ends up wit him gettin out and not gettin the help he needs? He could end up in an even worse shit hole! As I hear him explain what happened, he mentions they knocked his teeth out and swelled up eye and somehow messed up his left arm. So, I say to myself, I'm gon help this dude out. He might be hardcore and a tough case but you know what, he didn't deserve to get jumped like that, not after he was already in cuffs!

So, Ralph signs some papers and finally gets out. Old spanish dude comes in. Clinton disappears somewhere. Young woman comes in, me and the old spanish dude go to the bigger cell where Clinton was and she takes the small cell. Clinton comes back and he's in the cell with us just talking. Couple more kids come in but leave right out with tickets. It's like why even arrest them? Just give them tickets and send them on their way. So, now it's us three and we are all going to central booking on 161s street.

When we get there, I see this small ass room with all these dudes handcuffed just standing there hurting. Me personally, I am hurting more and more cuz now my wrists are softening, cutting from the cuffs, and swelling up. My shoulder which was already messed up was killing me. I'm sweating and salty sweat is gettin into my eye so I could hardly see. Anyway, the cop gave me some relief and allowed me to stretch a bit and wipe my eyes while I got my MUGSHOT! It's coming soon. I can't wait to get it! Then they take us to 49th precinct. But on the way, I had to get a cramp in my stomach. LOL. I was ok tho.

We got some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and I only ate one. As I explained to a friend (you know who you are lol), you kinda lose your appetite smelling shit and piss and being around a bunch of grimy dudes. I just drank liquids. They gave us a cheese sandwich wit NOTHING on it - just cheese. I am not trying to shit bricks. I figure everything is going to be ok. I got a cell to myself. Let me just lay out and go to sleep. NO LUCK! More people come in. I get a cell mate! More people come in, I get another cell mate. Young dude who came in last hit the floor. Now, old dudes don't give a fuck what you did but they happy to answer and comment. OG was in for possession and sales. Young dude was in for warrants. Anyway, OG laid down and my ass tried to play like I was at a superbowl party tryin to sleep sittin up! That bench gave NO comfort. Me and OG were switchin back and forth. He would sit up and sleep and then I would lay down.

Anyway, morning time comes. BREAKFAST TIME! Ok, let me see if I can at least try to eat something because I know I would catch a mean headache if I don't eat. Officer said we got butter rolls and orange juice. BUTTER ROLLS? Are you serious? A butter roll is bread roll with butter in it. Usually it's a lot of butter. These dudes spread a little bit of butter in the middle. The orange juice was like a little 4oz cup they serve in kindergarten and shit. I drank my juice, put down that bread shit. WTF I look like eating a bread roll. I know some people don't even get that much in some places but damn it, I figure I am gettin out, I will live. I've gone 2 days without eating ANYTHING, nor drinking any fluids before. It hasn't even been 24 hours yet. OG had like 3 of them shits - orange juice and bread!

So, it's time to go back to central booking. We all pile into a "milk wagon." Now there's some funny shit happening. It's weird. We got locked to the same chain - bout 10-12 to a chain. There was bout four chains, one half empty and we all fit into the wagon with people standing up. We were some of the most coordinated fellas I've ever seen. Most of the guys there weren't first timers. So dude in the lead was real organized and lead the chain. I was somewhat taken aback by this guys leadership skills cuz we moved VERY smoothly. So we're all in now and I get a seat.

These dudes want to smoke a cigarette real bad. Some have half smoked cigs, some have strikers, but NO ONE has any matches. The striker is the strip on the back that you strike the match on to get it lit. Anyway someone sees matches tucked into the metal grill of the light above us. These guys are trying their hardest to help get these matches. Their fingers couldn't get a grip on the matches. So one dude offered his belt - the piece of the buckle that goes through the hole.

Wagon was moving too much and we were concerned he would lose his fingers. So, you had three hands holding this guy steady while he tries to get the matches. I really respected the teamwork here. I don't smoke cigarettes but I like what's going on here! It was funny but it was serious. There's nothing to do in back of that wagon. These guys came together for one goal - smoke a cigarette. Dude that offered his belt ended up getting the matches cuz his fingers were thin enough.

So, we get to central booking just in time for the judges to go on a 2 hour break and they wouldn't be back til 2:30. Oh well we hang out, talk shit, get to the "What you in here for?" conversations and find out about other people. Then we get to moving finally around 3pm. They're moving us downstairs instead of upstairs. That means that it's small shit they can get rid of fast as possible. I figure it's a good thing if they move me here. People havin their cases suspended or thrown out.

But, once again they figured I was dumb. Everyone gets interviewed before they go to the judge. Interviewer tried to get me to cop to the lesser charge of Disorderly Conduct and they would toss out the charge of Inciting a Riot. I had cut him off loooong before he even mentioned me takin the lesser charge because I already knew he would try to give me a deal - a bullshit deal at that. I told the interviewer, "I want the charges dropped and my entire record expunged from the system." He asked me if I understood what I said. I'm thinking to myself, "I said it. I know what I said. I didn't pull it out my ass." So, some more waiting occurred and then they called about six of us to go stand in line. When it was my turn to go in, they sent me out quickly because "He got private counsel." DAMN STRAIGHT!

Finally, my lawyer came downstairs because he was expecting me to come upstairs and you know what happen when the lawyer came.

After seeing the judge...

The lawyer and I talk for a few minutes while we wait for my father and brother to come down to take me home. He's telling me that this case can go places because of what you've seen. I'm a witness in a police brutality case. There's a good chance for this to go on for quite a while. He said he might try to get me an interview wit the District Attorney and it would mean alot because I do speak well, clearly, and I am waving my right to silence. I have nothing to do with the case, win or lose. I have nothing to gain or lose.

After getting home...

I had to flex my newly minted thug muscles around and make some good jokes and stuff. I breathed my underarm funk on my brother, called it Prison Potpourri. My father told me that my mother was coming. I didn't understand she was already in NYC comin from the airport. When she came thru, I was on the phone for hours calling family members to let me know I was ok!

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